CMT Blog: Archive

Brett McVicker is a writer for CMT's series Country Fried Home Videos.

You know, this job has warped me in ways that I never imagined. I get so used to watching videos that I expect real life the play out the same way. It doesn't.

• I went out to the drag races the other day. None of the cars crashed. Not one of ‘em. I couldn't believe that every guy made it to the finish line. I haven't seen that happen in a while.
• I saw a guy riding his bike down my street. He didn't run into any trees. I did a double take.
• But I did see a guy fall down outside of the supermarket. Produce went flying everywhere. It was funny. But I asked myself: was it funny enough? And how do I rewind this so I can properly comment on it?
• Later, I was hanging out down by the river with some friends. I saw a bunch of girls floating around. But not one of them pulled out a giant catfish with her bare hands.
• And how come whenever I go visit my friends' houses, none of them have baboons, buffalo, vultures, mountain lions, or grizzly bears living inside with them? Everybody has dogs and cats. Boring.
• It was also shocking to realize that some bull riders actually ride the full eight seconds.
• But, on the plus side, I know never to enter an uphill snowmobile race, never to become a stuntman and never to allow a video camera to roll when there's anything around that could potentially hit my crotch. That's just asking for trouble. I love my crotch.