Divorce Duet Brings Me Back to a Bad Place
Thirty years later, Gatorade tastes like divorce to me.
After my parents had their marriage annulled, the time I spent at my dad’s new condo was always fueled with Gatorade — an indulgence my mom would never allow into our house. He stocked his fridge with it to make us like his place better. So now when I take even one sip, it triggers all my memories of that horrible time in my childhood.
And when I hear “Every Other Weekend,” the new Reba McEntire/Kenny Chesney duet about a divorcing couple, it triggers those very same long-dormant emotions.
“It’s movies on the sofa/Grilled cheese and cut the crust off/‘But that’s not the way mom makes it, daddy’/ Breaks my heart.” Lyrics have never cut to the heart of a custody arrangement like that. It may sound like it’s about a sandwich, but it’s not. It’s about how fathers can quickly become strangers to their own kids in a divorce. Everything my dad did was so un-mom-like. Therefore, I hated every minute.
“Every other Friday/It’s toys and clothes and backpacks/Is everybody in?/OK, let’s go see Dad.” My mom always had the same superficial lilt in her voice when she’d take us to my dad’s. She didn’t want to bring us, we didn’t want to go, but for the sake of the settlement she had to fake it. Ironic, isn’t it, that even after a divorce so many women still have to play the part of the loving wife.
“Every other Sunday/I empty out my backseat/While my children hug their mother in the parking lot.” Yes. Yes. Yes. This is exactly how I remember it. My dad would barely stop the car and I’d escape into my mom’s familiar arms. That was where I knew I belonged.
In the Reba-Kenny version, they’re both pining for the love they once had. But real life isn’t like a country song. Divorce happens. A lot. So even though it’s hard to listen to a song about the struggles of joint custody, it’s real. And it’s a bittersweet reminder that in every broken home, there are always a few broken hearts.
©2008 Country Music Television, Inc., a Viacom company. A division of
Katie says:
I love this song!! Kenny has the best voice.. They really sound good together.
Lori says:
Kenny and Reba always hit you right in the heart. They both are very talented beyond measure! This song is one I think any one that has been through a divorce where there is children involved can relate to. Whether it’s your own divorce, someone you know and loves, or just anyone in general. Divorce is sad enough, but when children have to go through it too, it is really tough! I love this song! They sound very good together, and really make you feel the very emotion of it! Good job!
Marci says:
This song really hits home for me because I come from a divorced family and this song was my life. That’s what it was really like for me as a child.
Rick says:
Two of the best divorce aftermath songs that made it big on mainstream country radio in recent years were Doug Supernaw’s “I Don’t Call Him Daddy” (from the excellent “Red & Rio Grande” album), and Toby Keith’s “Who’s That Man”. The greatest country songs have always been able to make a deep emotional connection on a real level, and these songs were masterpieces in this regard.
There are two other equally powerful songs about this topic that I’m aware of that haven’t been heard by near as many people. On Rhonda Vincent’s excellent “One Step Ahead” album the song “Caught In The Crossfire” is sung from the perspective of a five year old caught in the middle of a custody battle. Rhonda’s plaintive vocals on this track add amazing depth to the heart wrenching subject at hand.
The other excellent song sadly never made it officially out of the studio, which is especially appalling as it has radio hit written all over it. The song I’m referring to is Lane Turner’s “Horses” about a father who is turning his young son over to his divorced wife for primary custody. As the boy packs to leave the father tells his son “And the horses want me to tell you, don’t forget how to ride. And the fish they promised not to bite, till you’re back here by my side….” Lane rightfully should be the “New George Strait” with the looks and voice to satisfy George’s fans, and unlike George Lane writes amazing songs (for Major Bob Music). How Warners Nashville dropped the ball with a talent like Lane back in 2005 will always be one of country music’s great mysteries…..
Molly says:
This song is amazing.
I’ve Never Been In A Divorce Situation With Parents Or Anything.
But that song hits you hard and I always cry or tear up when I hear it.
They are incredible!
austin says:
wow
Ann Marie says:
This song and article hits so close to home for me. The funny thing is that my parents are not divorced, but my best childhood friend’s did when we were in primary school. I remember her begging me to come with her on weekends to her dads and it was horrible. Her mother gave us that look before her dad would pick us up and then it was like we were in the twighlight zone, he’d give us pizza and soda and all that junk. To this day, I still remember how horrible it was for my friend and that I have never felt more uncomfortable in my entire life, into my adulthood, then when I spent weekends there. I now work for http://www.firstwivesworld.com which is an online community for women going through the various stages of divorce. I love it, I love being a part of making that was so horrible for me, let alone my friend!, better. It is an amazing website and I feel honored to be a part of it.
Just my two cents
Ann Marie
jim says:
the reba–vince gill duet on her her cd room to breathe is
the best divorce/seperation song
the title is it just has to be that way
Charlie says:
what about the ORIGINAL divorce/child/separation song, D-i-v-o-r-c-e by Tammy Wynette? The new duet carries on that tradition :)
Talisa says:
I love Reba McEntire and every single song of her’s. I really like Kenny Chesney too. Them singing together just makes their song even better. I hope they do more duets!
megan says:
This is a really geat sonng, and Reba’s new single if you like it you should request it!
Dee says:
I feel bad for the poster who felt that the place she belonged was in her mother’s arms and not her dad’s? Wouldn’t the appropriate place be both of their arms? I understand that every divorce situation has its own details and particulars. And sometimes, the man is the dog who doesn’t deserve the consideration of joint custody or visitation. But it seems to me the hardest thing about divorce for the kids is having to choose between parents, unless a parent is abusive or neglectful (physically or emotionally) each should resolve to make sure the divorce be about the dissolution of the parents’ relationship, not the degradation or undermining of each individual parent’s relationship with the children.
d says:
This song is really moving and sad, but I loved it the first moment I heard it. I think they sound great together, I’m glad Reba released it as a single. I can understand why it would touch a chord for those who have gone through a divorce, either as spouses or children, and why that might be painful. But isn’t that why we like country music? It touches us, tells our life stories, gives us situations we can relate to–it is the music of our lives. I say well done Kenny & Reba!